Aggression and Closing Threads

FOR ALL CLARITY: This is a friendly :) post! I am not trying to upset anyone! I am just interested in a positive discussion :) :) :)

Well, it seems that now that it is winter a lot of us are frustrated that we cannot sail and people like myself try to talk about sailing and related issues. Apparently some of us express themselves in a manner that is offensive to others. Ironically this happened in a thread on aggression, in which I think all of the participants agreed that aggression on the water is not acceptable.
I actually thought the discussion was interesting. Perhaps we can talk now - until sunday 10 pm - about what is appropriate on a forum and what is not?

I think that often people misunderstand one another and that the result is that one gets angry, resulting in more anger from the other side. This is, I think, the problem with email or electronic messages: you do not see the other person and you take everything very serious. Combined with the misinterpretations that always happen this is sometimes a fatal combination. How can we avoid this?

Secondly, is it a good policy to close a forum for a while to let people cool off?

Thirdly, I think we need some provocative voices. Let's not all just sit down and go with the flow. I think a discussion about, for example, a ruling by US Sailing is necessary. We all can imagine - well sort of - what it must be like to be kicked out of the spory of sailing for a couple of years. How can one be provocative without without upsetting everyone (or is it the reply to the provocative remark that should be different)?

Georg

FOR ALL CLARITY: This is a friendly :) post! I am not trying to upset anyone! I am just interested in a positive discussion :) :) :)
 
Nice thread Georg!!

JUst now I re read the last few posts on the PCC thread and I don't really think they were all that mean or nasty.
I did have a strong ..."Damnnit! Why the hell can't I write in a fashion where the reader sees what I was thinking as I wrote?"

Followed by. "Well phooey. I can't even have a chance to explain myself."

On the other hand I have been trying to explain myself with respect to the entire Brodie incident since it originaly happened.

Somehow, whatever I try to write it comes out as. "If I had been there I would have been throwing Brodie out of the way and punching the kid myself."

Mostly I should probably give before the hole gets deeper.
 
From reading the closed thread, I would guess that in this instance the offending remarks were made toward you, Gourvernail, not by you. Remember Bradley's policy of making everyone feel free to post here. How can it look to newbies or even old time forum members who see one forum member tell another that his post was a "load of crap." I know it offends me.
 
About the "crappy remarks:" I don't get very upset about these remarks, unless my own remark is indeed crappy.
My point: a big problem is that people do not read very well and are insulted and start to yell at one another, while in fact the comment that upset them is not so upsetting.
Even while I initially was upset about closing the thread as well, it is maybe not such a bad idea to close the thread for a couple of days so that people can look again at what upset them so much. We often loose perspective and forget that we are perhaps insulting others, who are not only virtual people on the internet, but also REAL people whom we might run into sooner or later.
Georg
 
If my remarks were personally offensive, I apologize (but I don't think they were). Sometimes it's hard to judge expression and emotion on a forum, especially when you don't personally know the other person. Then you also have trolls that intentionally cause trouble. These are easy to identify, they never have any sound advice or help with newbies, they just make trouble in the tough threads. They should be bounced (IMO).
I am active on a number of different forums, and assist in moderating on one of them. So far, I have never had to delete any posts, but we did have to close one. It was closed simply because the thread had run its course, was effectively dead, but a couple guys would not let it go and simply continued to repeat themselves. I don't see that happening in this case.
Since it is no secret there are minors here, our "censoring" should be a bit more strict than an adult would expect (nothing worse than what they might run across at the club) and I have no problem having it that way. Kids are good for the sport, and if they can be boosted along their learning curve here, it's worth giving up a bit of "freedom of speech" to have them around.
If the right people are chosen for moderating, there should'nt be a need for strict adhesion to policy. Good judgement is usually good enough. I do think that if it's not completely clear why a thread is closed or post is deleted, an explanation should accompany said actions.
 
then of course there are the guys like me who tell you they really are trying to write nice stuff but just have to twist theh knife while feigning nice...
\
who me??
 
computeroman2 said:
Hmmm.....So how do we deal with posts that, though written with the best intentions, are in fact a load of crap?

I have learned that it is simply part of an open forum. Not much you can do about it. As long as it's "PG13" (if that's what has been decided as acceptable language), each reader can only take it for what it's worth to them. Some get bent out of shape easier than others, some have skin tough as a shark, or space aged flame suits. Never take a forum post for any more than it is..... just another readers opinion.
 
gouvernail said:
then of course there are the guys like me who tell you they really are trying to write nice stuff but just have to twist theh knife while feigning nice...
\
who me??

Well, I guess you do a really nice job in finding the right balance: Everyone hates and loves you! :mad: + :) = Gouvernail!
 
computeroman2 said:
Hmmm.....So how do we deal with posts that, though written with the best intentions, are in fact a load of crap?

I'm just being honest. In fact had I effectively comunicated what I meant to communicate your reply may have been>>>

computeroman2 said:
Hmmm.....So how do we deal with posts that, though written with the best intentions, are in fact also sarcastic or mean spirited?


My answer to that would be..Yes and I plead guilty.


There are ways to tell the woman in the tight jeans her butt is big and sometimes for whatever reason I decide not to tell her she is perfect.
 

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